Unedited notes on my first try at yoga

by Anonymous

So... I know nothing about yoga but I gave the introductory video a try and here are my unedited notes (because I'm a scientist and that's what I do).

"Cockroach who died near a wall... oh wait... it's arms are moving... it's not dead" pose (obviously not what she called it)
1) I can keep my back flat on the ground and get all the way up against the wall
2) My right leg wants to rotate to about 45 degrees.  I also notice this on the back of my dress shoes, the right shoe wears at an angle but the left one does not. I also have knee pain when I ride my bike, but only ever in the right knee.  I imagine all of these things are related. However, when I do that 90/90 test, I have trouble staying upright on the left side, not the right.
3) When I bring my arms to the floor, at about 30 degrees I struggle to keep them from rotating inwards (palms want to face forwards... with my face)
4) I paused the video too early and did a backwards roll to stop being a cockroach.  It was a fun roll.

Didn't remove my gels at the TSA pose
1) I noticed when I backed up from the wall that, despite my best efforts to get my hands level, my right hand was about an inch lower when I moved back and could see it.  I also often notice that my right backpack strap is shorter when I think they feel the same.  So, again, I think I'm broken.
2) My right hip wants to rotate forwards and my left shoulder wants to drop. I told them "stop it, that's not funny!" But they didn't care and kept on trying to do it.

Mountain pose... I can say this one.
1) Sweet, this is just standing. She's just going to stand there. Wait a second... why can't I seem to stand properly? Stupid yoga. My left shoulder is rotated forward... it's hard to unroll it. I can't tell why my shoulders feel weird and different from each other. One of them is doing something wrong.  I'm blaming lefty but it could be righty playing mind games?

The chair one
1) "I put a little height on my chair because I'm tall"... no you're not, I'm tall, but thanks for thinking of us tallies.
2) This is getting concerning. My left shoulder is rotated forward (classic hunch) but I can barely get it unrotated to do the pressing when it's lefties turn.

The sitting one
1) What if when I'm spreading and opening my chest, the left shoulder doesn't want to cooperate? Again, it is rotated forward but I can't make it feel like the right side.
2) "Just see how you feel in your head... mentally." My answer is "concerned... I think I'm broken."

Concluding thoughts and questions
1) She seems really nice. Did she put this together for me at your request? If so, please send a huge thank you! If not, please still send a huge thank you.
2) How often should I do this? Should this be daily? Multi-daily because of my weirdness?
3) If I keep doing this, is it likely to fix me?
4) In non-yoga situations I don't refer to my arms as "righty" and "lefty".

You also now know that although I take note-taking seriously, I don't take serious notes.

Thank you for the video!

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